| What many people don’t know about me is that before I became a transformation coach, I was a professional librarian. Lately, I’ve been thinking: the library is a powerful metaphor for identity. Each of us carries an internal “library” filled with stories authored by different parts of us. Some are grounded in lived experience. Others are interpretations, assumptions, or outright fiction. Just like a real library, these stories span every category. Some belong in nonfiction: autobiographical, psychological, historical. These are rooted in things that actually happened. Others belong in fiction: stories shaped by imagination, fear, or projection. And yet, many of us treat these imagined stories as if they’re just as real as our lived experience. As a librarian, my job was to catalog books: to understand their content, assign meaning, and make them accessible. That required asking: What is this really about? How would someone look for it? What does it relate to? Can this source be trusted? What if you became the cataloger of your own identity? How would you classify your stories? Which ones are easy to access and which are buried or mislabeled? Which ones have been given authority they don’t deserve? It’s not a simple task. We all have blind spots. Some of our stories were written unconsciously. Others were shaped long ago and never revisited. But nearly every story in your internal library is trying to answer a few core questions: Who am I? What is the world like? What is safe and what isn’t? Where are the opportunities for growth? To make this work more practical, I think of the Identity Library as having five main sections: Protective Stories Written by parts trying to keep you safe. “Don’t try! You’ll fail.” Wounded Stories Written from past hurt. “People always leave.” Adaptive Stories Formed to help you survive. “If I’m perfect, I’ll be accepted.” Emerging Stories New narratives beginning to take shape. “Maybe there’s another way.” Wise Stories Voices of integration and perspective. “I can learn from this.” In future newsletters, we’ll explore how to “Re-Story” the narratives that no longer serve you, and make new ones easier to access. In my work with clients, I help them not only identify the type of stories that are guiding their lives but which parts are authoring them. For now, pause and take a look at your own library: Who are the dominant authors? Which sections are overcrowded? Which ones are underdeveloped? And most importantly: Which stories are you treating as truth that might actually belong in fiction? |
What Is In Your Identity Library
