That question, “Have you seen the other reality yet?” isn’t just rhetorical. It’s a way to notice the stories your mind automatically tells you and ask whether they really reflect what is happening.
In fact, S-T-O-R-Y can stand for:
See The Other Reality Yet?
It’s a simple reminder that every circumstance we encounter can have multiple interpretations, if we are willing to be a little creative.
Most people define reality as the state of things as they actually are. We assume that our interpretation of experience is grounded in truth, fact-based, and objective.
Yet our experience is always mediated by the story our minds tell us. That story maintains continuity, validates our assumptions, and allows our brains to operate efficiently. Most of the time, we don’t even realize a story is operating in the background until we pause long enough to audit it.
Our brains are consummate pattern-recognition machines. Our survival depends upon their ability to predict outcomes and find structure amid the constant flow of chaotic data the world presents to us. Recognizing patterns and assigning meaning to them is an essential tool for navigating our human experience.
But sometimes the pattern we recognize doesn’t actually fit our current circumstances.
The incredible efficiency of our pattern recognition often prevents us from questioning the story our minds have attached to the pattern. If it has been true in the past, why wouldn’t it be true now? Add in our natural discomfort with uncertainty, and we become even less likely to consider alternative interpretations.
And sometimes it’s not just “the mind” telling the story. Different parts of us carry different expectations about how the world works. When one of those parts recognizes a familiar pattern, it can quickly step in and declare that it already knows how the story ends.
It takes courage, curiosity, and creativity to look beyond the supposed certainty of our minds. Yet there can be great joy, productivity, and freedom in discovering a new reality.
Sometimes it can even be fun.
Many years ago, when salad bars were just becoming popular, I went to a restaurant for lunch. I piled my plate high with lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, beans, croutons, everything that looked good.
Among the offerings were some purplish-red vegetables cut into thin matchstick shapes. I didn’t know what they were, but I was feeling adventurous and added them to my salad.
Back at my table, I tossed the salad with dressing and began eating. It was delicious.
Before leaving the restaurant, my curiosity got the better of me. I asked one of the staff what that red vegetable was because I had never seen it before. “They’re beets,” she said.
My response was immediate and revealing. “No, they can’t be beets. I hate beets! Are you sure?”
Thankfully, she didn’t roll her eyes at my unwillingness to confront reality.
I had never seen beets cut that way before. I grew up eating canned beets which I absolutely detested. Beets were only barely tolerable when hidden among the other flavors in borscht. Even then, I would have preferred them not to be there.
Fresh beets cut into matchsticks simply didn’t fit the reality my mind had already decided was true. My mind had already written the story, “Beets are terrible.” The evidence on my plate simply hadn’t been admitted yet.
Since that day, I have happily eaten beets in salads and on their own. I no longer cringe at the thought of them. My willingness to consider another beet reality has added both nutrition and enjoyment to my life.
It is remarkably easy to become wedded to a familiar story. When the story works, that’s fine. But when it doesn’t, that’s the moment to pause and conduct a Story Audit so you can consciously Re-Story your experience in a way that better serves the situation you’re in.
The next time you find yourself absolutely certain about what something means, pause for a moment and ask yourself a simple question:
S-T-O-R-Y
Have I seen the other reality yet?
If you try this question this week, I’d love to hear what you notice.