Last week, we talked about moving from being the author of your story to becoming a scientist, testing the validity of the story you’ve been telling yourself.

Unfortunately (and I know this from years of personal experience), insight alone doesn’t change our lives. It’s what we do with that insight that begins to reshape who we believe ourselves to be.

Today, let’s step into the ReStory Lab. I’ll walk you through a simple way to design your own “identity experiment” so you can begin testing your stories, gathering real evidence, and discovering what is actually true.

Our identity is built on the evidence of our lived experience.

If you want to change your story, you have to gather new evidence.

The Identity Experiment

1. Name the Story (Your Hypothesis)

“I’m terrible at seeing spatial relationships.”

“I always procrastinate.”

“I’m not a confident person.”

Now, shift your statement slightly:

“My current hypothesis is that I’m terrible at seeing spatial relationships.”

“My current hypothesis is that I always procrastinate.”

“My current hypothesis is that I’m not a confident person.”

Do you notice what changes?

Most people feel a sense of space and room for curiosity, rather than accepting the belief as an immutable truth.

You’re no longer declaring your reality.

You’re testing it.

2. Design a Small Experiment

Ask yourself: What is one small, low-risk way I could test whether this is actually true?

Keep it:

• Specific
• Behavioral
• Repeatable

If your story is “I’m terrible at seeing spatial relationships,” try a very small jigsaw puzzle (they make them as small as six pieces) and see if you can get any pieces to fit together.

If your story is “I procrastinate,” work on something for just ten minutes.

If your story is “I’m not confident,” speak up once in a meeting.

Notice what begins to shift:

From “I’m terrible at seeing spatial relationships”

→ “I can see how to fit several pieces together.”

From “I always procrastinate”

→ “I can get started when I make the task small enough.”

From “I’m not confident”

→ “My confidence increases after I take action.”

3. Gather Data (Not Judgment)

This is the most important shift.

Laboratories are controlled environments so experiments aren’t distorted by outside influences.

In your experiment, you are not evaluating yourself.

You are observing what happens.

Ask:

• What did I actually do?
• What happened as a result?
• What surprised me?

Notice the difference between observation and judgment.

Instead of:

“I did it wrong.”

“See, I knew it.”

Try:

“That’s interesting…”

Curiosity keeps the experiment alive.

Judgment shuts it down.

4. Revise the Story

Based on the data you gathered, update your hypothesis to be more accurate:

“I’m terrible at seeing spatial relationships”

→ “When I take the time to look carefully, I can begin to see how pieces connect.”

“I always procrastinate”

→ “I can get started when the task feels manageable.”

“I’m not confident”

→ “My confidence increases after I take action.”

This is how stories change:

not through force, but through evidence.


5. Repeat

One experiment won’t undo a lifetime of belief.

But repetition begins to loosen certainty.

For the past six months, I’ve been practicing jigsaw puzzles. Yesterday, I completed my first 250-piece puzzle.


A year ago, I would have told you that was impossible.

But through daily practice, simply training my ability to see shapes, I can now discern patterns and connections I couldn’t see before.

Each day, I gather new evidence.

Each day, the story shifts.

Not because I forced it to change,

but because I gave myself the opportunity to discover something different.

What experiment are you willing to run this week to ReStory one of your limiting beliefs?